Rainbow Diaries: Black Friday success

Sunday 8 December 2024: Weeks 11

Life is busy at the moment itsn’t it?!

Let’s move straight onto the diaries…

1. This Week's Internal Weather Report!

Here goes for the weather forecast for the week…

  • Storm clouds: Other than the usual pre-Christmas stresses, the biggest storm clouds for us has been my late husband’s birthday on Monday. It’s a day both kids traditionally struggle, but we use it as our time to put the decorations up, but more on that below.

  • Rainbow: The success of my Black Friday discount was this week’s rainbow… I’ve never run a Black Friday offer before and, at such a busy & expensive time of year, I think it’s a great idea… so it will be a regular feature annually going forwards.

  • Sunshine: Spending time with the kids shopping, decorating the tree and a yard meal out… as ever, it’s those magical moments of connection with others that means more than any purchase.

2. Business Reflections

  • Grief and Life Coaching updates: As well as the gorgeous Rainbow Hunting 1:1 clients, I’ve taken on two volunteer Cruse clients over the Christmas period. My supervisor thought I was a bit mad, but it’s the time when people really need support, so it feels like the least I could do.

  • Course creation update: I am loving running the Sadmin course. It really is the best one yet. We’ve done some psychology behind avoidance and setting the foundations and next we’re moving onto Wills. I’m re-writing and re-recording the content and fingers crossed it’s going really well.

  • Light-bulb moment: I made a decision this year not to stress so much about cards and presents and, although I’m actually a big fan of Christmas cards, I always say that it’s important to do Christmas in the way that suits you best. People would far rather that you are content and happy and send a text or voice note to say you are thinking of them, than you get super stressed about cards and presents… so this Christmas, You do You!

3. Parenting Teens in Grief

  • Family highlights: The kids and I have been given an amazing gift by my parents, a trip away together to the mountains in February skiing. The downside is that they needed new clothes (which are their Christmas present from me!)… so our family highlight of the week was going to Clarks Village in Street to make the most of the outlet discounts on top of Black Friday sales to get ski clothes at a knock down price… Team Gray are kitted out and super excited to hit the slopes!

  • Challenge of the week: It’s an annual challenge dealing with the big grief dates and Monday’s birthday for a father who isn’t here anymore is a biggie. As it was a school day, life continued fairly normally till I collected them, at which point we put on Christmas tunes, decorated the house and our tree and ate some of his favourite food for supper… he always loved taking the kids to buy the tree and setting it up, so it has become a bit of a family tradition. Finding ways of doing things to incorporate loved ones after they have died is so important and it was an emotional but lovely day.

  • Lesson learned: As mentioned above, grief at Christmas-time can be a tricky thing to navigate but it is important to do things in the way that suits you best. Our newish tradition of putting up the tree on my late husband’s birthday means we feel him with us throughout the festive period. At this time of year it is important to prioritise you and your needs… so, as the kids would say, and I mentioned above make sure You do You!

4. Adventures with ADD

  • Classic ADD moment: This week I’ve had huge bursts of hyper-focus… which has been amazing because they’ve related to my special interest… which is my business! So, I’ve not just re-written the Wills part of the Sadmin course but I pushed on and did the LPAs, health documents and a large part of the practical section too!

  • Coping strategy spotlight: At this time of year when the days are short and there are so many demands on our time, one of the things I’ve learnt to do is to lean into my energy… so when I’m tired I head to bed early and when I have a spurt of energy I run with it… we all have up and down days but life is easier when you don’t do things exhausted!

  • ND silver lining: I really love my ability to do what my elder daughter calls “locking in” to a project… it means that everything else gets parked for later, but I’m so productive!

5. Widow's Corner

  • Memory Lane: Front of my mind this week has been the trips we had in the early years to get Christmas trees with my late husband… memories of him being as excited as the kids about choosing a tree, seeing the reindeer, wandering around the nativity… or perhaps it was the free mulled wine and minced pie at the local Christmas tree farm that put on such a good show! Regardless, they are such happy memories that will be cherished forever.

  • Grief self care: I’m not sure how much of this is neurodivergence, but one thing that I’ve worked on really hard this year is regulating my emotions… certain things can really disregulate me… strange things like the growling noise the dog makes when she plays with the kids, or being interrupted when I’m working… but the more I work on noticing it and pausing to control how I respond the calmer I am. Strange one for self care but one I think we should all be taught how to do, it would save so much strife in relationships!.

  • Bittersweet rainbows: I felt so grateful for the gorgeous friends who messaged me on Simon’s birthday to tell me that they are thinking of us all. Sometimes we don’t realise how amazing these friendships are until they are tested.

6. Horse Tales

  • Update from the stables: After worrying about mud fever with the horses out 24/7, they’ve been in the end of this week because of Storm Darragh and the predicted red weather warning… meaning lots of mucking out, but I feel so grateful that they are safe in their stables out of the gales.

  • Horse Rainbows: Most lovely horse moment was definitely the yard Christmas meal… the first outing for the Christmas jumpers and such a lovely evening seeing fellow horsey folk looking lovely all dressed up, another reminder of how important time together is.

7. Sadmin Check-in

  • Weekly paperwork win: Tidying up the side on the kitchen… a little thing but one I think we all fall into… that place where you put things before you action them! Still magazines there waiting to be read, but no post hiding amongst it anymore!

  • Current Sadmin challenge: Making time to do the Sadmin course myself seems to be a block… I’m so busy re-writing and recording it for others, but I’m yet to work through it myself!

  • Tip of the week: Too often we underestimate the power of a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment or the smallest act of caring… each of which have the potential to turn a life around… focus on the little things that bring you joy this week!

8. Looking Ahead

  • Next week's goal: Having released the Wills module last week for the Sadmin course, next is the LPAs and I’m giving a talk to some Financial Planners on Tuesday on grief, so together with 1:1 clients it’s another busy week ahead!

  • Self-care plan: I love to have 30 minutes in the mornings to journal and get my head straight… self care for this week is to focus on making that time each day to set the day right!

As ever, thank you for taking time to read my ramblings… if anything has resonated please send me an email or message me on social media and let me know.

Finally, please remember… however you are feeling… you are not alone… there are amazing charities out there who can support and if you want to make an investment in yourself I’m here for coaching. Please listen to your gut and reach for the support you feel you need.

Until next week, keep hunting for those rainbows!

Take care of your gorgeous selves!

Emma x

PS Black Friday might be over, but if you need any grief or life admin support over the Christmas holidays, there’s a tiny bit of space left in my diary, full details of the 1:1 sessions can be found here.

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Rainbow Diaries: Surviving the Storms!

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Rainbow Diaries: Start of Sadmin & Storm Bert!